By Jay A. Fernandez

If you’re anything like me, inevitably there were a handful of moments where you thought, What the hell is going on up there? Here are my Top 10. Your contributions are welcome.

About time, wrong role: Julianna Margulies had previously been nominated six times, including four nods for “E.R.,” and only now took the best actress, drama series award for “The Good Wife.”

Bad choice, Part 1: To introduce best picture, comedy nominee “It’s Complicated,” which explores marriage and divorce, kids, loss and middle-aged life experience, the HFPA chose … Cameron Diaz. Huh?

Bad choice, Part 2: Along those same lines, the HFPA recruited 17-year-old Taylor Lautner to introduce best picture, comedy nominee “(500) Days of Summer.” Despite his physique, Lautner’s barely been alive for 500 days, let alone experienced any of the kind of romance and heartbreak detailed in the movie.

Rough pairing: Do Jennifer Aniston and Gerard Butler absolutely hate each other? Their clipped pre-nomination patter while they presented was dead air. Maybe they were in character for “The Bounty Hunter,” in which they play sparring ex-spouses, but that was three seconds of icy airtime.

The happiest PA in Hollywood: While Chloe Sevigny was accepting her award for best supporting actress in a series, she was scrolling off thank yous until she said, “Especially George, my favorite on-set PA, who runs my lines with me every morning.” This may be the only time in the history of Hollywood that a PA has ever been thanked from the stage of a major awards show. Poor George probably put his eye out with the violent force of his sudden erection.

Movie stars are different from you and me, Exhibit A: Halle Berry. In that dress. The first time in my life I’ve envied a single piece of lacing.

Even Hollywood royalty isn’t above juvenile dirty jokes: Robert De Niro, while presenting Martin Scorsese with his DeMille award, launched into a ribald little riff on the exalted director’s intimate relationship with cinema: “I hear there are videos on the Internet of Marty having sex with film.” Fellow presenter Leonardo DiCaprio followed up by joking about all the people later tonight bound to Google “Scorsese sex film canister.” How soon before a New York punk band jumps on that name?

Somebody’s getting laid tonight: As if winning the best actor, drama award wasn’t sexy enough, Jeff Bridges used the first moments of his speech to instruct the camera crew to get a shot of his wife of 33 years. “She’s fine,” I think Bridges said from the stage. Dude, skip the parties.

Awkward product placement: So Scorsese, deservedly, gets his DeMille award with a stirring montage of his work. Tacked on to the end is a mini-trailer for his new movie, “Shutter Island,” which, uh, didn’t come out last year. It was supposed to, until Paramount bumped it out of awards season to February.

Turnabout is fair play: Jason Reitman and Sheldon Turner share credit on the screenplay for “Up in the Air.” Friday night, at the Broadcast Critics Awards show when they won, Reitman gave his acceptance speech before Turner reached the stage and then left him to be drowned out by the music. During the Globes show, when Harrison Ford introduced the movie, the camera crew cut to nominees George Clooney, Vera Farmiga, Anna Kendrick and Reitman, but not Turner. It looked like he was going to get the shaft again. This time, though, Turner shrewdly got to the microphone first, took the trophy and got his thoughts in before handing it, and the floor, to Reitman, who then spoke as the music came up on him. Neither showed up to the backstage interview room after winning. These guys are pretty much destined to win the Oscar for adapted screenplay, so something needs to get worked out.